My life has been compulsive eating and sky rockets in flight and sizzurp and enrolling in classes that don’t actually have anything to do with my major. As it stands, I will be taking German 3, Nudity in the Western Tradition, and Computer Literacy for my spring quarter. That last one is a complete joke, but it was the only open class I could find that didn’t conflict with the film classes I’m trying to crash. When I told my older sister that I was taking Computer Literacy she said, “Sweet, reading the Internet!”

I’m not sure how I feel about this email I got this morning:

Dear UCSC residential students:

We have received reports of an individual (described below) approaching female students on campus, attempting to engage them in inappropriate sexually suggestive conversation, trying to find out where they live, and touching them inappropriately. He also attempts to gain entry to residential buildings and approach female students in their rooms.

We ask for all students to be vigilant in reporting this individual to campus police by calling 911 immediately upon seeing him. Campus police are aware of this matter as are the Community Safety officers. These staff, as well as residential staff in the colleges are also on the lookout for him.

Description: He is described as approximately 6 feet tall, African American, approximately 20 -25 years of age. He seems to be mentally challenged and this is evident upon talking with him. He was recently seen wearing khaki pants, brown loafers, a red white and blue striped, button down shirt and a navy beanie. He sometimes carries a large backpack.

In addition to calling 911 immediately upon seeing this individual, please remember the following safety precautions:

-Never let anyone unknown to you follow you into a secure residential facility
-Keep you room door locked
-Walk with friends at night
-Be aware of your surroundings and always report suspicious persons or situations to campus police.

Thank you for your vigilance in this matter, and your assistance in keeping the campus safe.

I mean there are things I could say about it, but I’d rather let the text speak for itself because it’s fucking ridiculous.

I was frustrated yesterday, but not for my own incompetence as a friend, which I should have been more concerned with. ‘Student activism’ deterred me from doing anything mildly productive outside of consuming expensive tacos, hopping non-fences, and convincing photographers that I was not pissed. I’m trying to replace irreconcilability with honesty but this is a collision of worlds I’m not accustomed to. WHATEVER, I’ve alleviated some tension today. It was a humbling experience.

“Colorless green ideas sleep furiously” is a sentence composed by Noam Chomsky in 1957 as an example of a sentence with correct grammar (logical form) but semantics which are nonsensical. The sentence therefore has no understandable meaning. An example of a category mistake, it was used to show inadequacy of the then-popular probabilistic models of grammar, and the need for more structured models.

Said I’ll take you, Kathleen. To your home and mine.

Cognitive dissonance is a key term here–thank you intro to psychology–and I’m just going to say that life is a performance. My behavior is a performance, I am playing a character in a teen exploitation film, although I suppose we’re all young adults now, but not the kind that read vampire novels, we’re in the weird in-between stage of drinking soda and renting cars.

Right now, this is crucial. And I will fuck with your rendering of these words.

Prior to ostensible life-affirming proceedings, I wanted to crawl into a dark corner and retain an air of obscurity, dismissing any moment of intimacy if it meant that I did not also lose enticement.

But now, I’d like to share, share, share <3